I received a really nice critique today from someone who loved my work. I have to admit I smiled and perked right up. I feel like I’ve taken a beating lately with critiques and it can be discouraging.
Quintessentialeditor has a great post on writing groups/critiques; just published. He talks about ground rules that should be in place and sticking to the Authors agenda and needs.
While most of my critiques have been pretty much spot on, there have been quite a few people lately, that do more advising than critiquing. They try to take over your story and tell you how they think you should approach a situation.
With those people I simply say, “Thank you for the critique” and quietly trash it. Always remember this is your story and your vision. Don’t let someone else derail your work. It doesn’t mean you can’t read their comments and consider their points. I’ve received some good advice as well.
I also try to remember, that most people providing those hurtful critiques, want to help, but as Quintessentialeditor says, they need some ground rules.
It may be necessary to cut ties with some critique partners. This is an extreme, but you don’t want to allow anyone to crush your dream. You have to decide, who is helping you on your journey and who is holding you back.